My wishes are valid as long as the unfortunate event happens when I am still single and my parents are still alive. Of course, when I am married and I already have sons and daughters, these wishes would be entirely different.. =) BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN THAT I AM READY TO DIE NOW!!! I PLAN TO LIVE A VERY LONG LIFE.
Actually, I find this activity very much dramatic. I am so much emotional when one talks of death, especially death of my loved ones. This would be, I think, the first time (like most of us are) that I will be talking FULLY about my death. Of course, I know that I will die some day, but that day is the one I do not care the most for now – until came this activity.
1.Health care representative
When I will not be able to decide for my own health or my own life perhaps, I want my mother and my father to decide for me. I know it would be very hard for them to do so, especially for my Mama, that is why I wanted my father to be the other half when it comes to decision-making. My mother, for sure, will be very emotional but I know, my father, though will also be depressed by the situation, and will be able to decide rationally.
But I think this would be unfair for them. I think for them to see me in a situation that I am not sound, not able to talk or not even able to move is already a suffering for them. Though I know they will arrive at the rational decision, I think it will take them time – a very long time to accept what they see. I trust them though, a hundred and one percent. But just in case that the decision (whether to keep me alive or otherwise) is needed immediately, I wanted one of my best friends – Jona, to decide for me. Jona is an outstanding Nursing student, that alone I think is enough for her to balance things out (medical versus emotional; reality versus hope and faith).
BUT REALLY I AM TORN. I think to let Jona decide will be disrespectful to my parents. So, I think before Jona finalizes the decision, I want her to consult to my parents – and Jona please convince them! My mother, my father and Jona will compose the decision-making body when time comes that I am not able to decide for myself.. (whew!)
2.Medical treatment I prefer and not
While my health care representatives are thinking, I want all possible medical procedures and aids. For my healthcare representatives, ensure that the ALLAN everybody knew will be the very same ALLAN after the procedure or the treatment. I do not want my parents to suffer by seeing them try and try and yet my chances of living are slim. Yes, I am consenting to be treated, but again, if and only if it will revive me – all of what I am. And please, to my parents, I know it will be very hard, but do not attempt to keep me alive when you know that I could not. Again, if the chances are slim to have ME back, do not anymore attempt. I would be more than happy to die at that very moment rather than see you hoping for things that are not sure to happen.. I want to live of course – a normal life – without damages and life-changing injuries.
For organ donations, I just do not like the idea of distributing my body organs. Though this decision might change, but for now, NO.
3.How comfortable I want to be
While my health care representatives are debating whether to keep me alive or not and I am still unconscious in my hospital room, I want all the following to happen..
• I want to be moved to the biggest air-conditioned room the hospital can offer. I do not want to be confined in the house, I want to stay at the hospital.
• I want a good bed; my current bed would be the best. Do not clean my bed if I am going to use it in the hospital. My favorite Taz pillow should always be on my right side, and the pillows for my head should be the same pillows that I am using today. Again, do not wash them, I want them that way. Also, I want my blanket. I want to use it. Who knows if I am getting cold..
• I do not want flowers on my room, I hate maintaining flowers and I do not want to add burden to my caretaker.
• I still want to take a bath every day. My mother will make sure of this.
• If my hair is too long, I want it cut. Consult my friends on which haircut will best fit me. I do not trust my family when it comes to hair styling. Also, to my family, do not forget to trim my nails.
• If my phone’s mp3 player is still working, please randomly play the music in the storage card.
• I do not want the lights to be turned off, I might be scared.
• Movies? By that time, I think I have watched all horror flicks I wanted so do not attempt to play any horror, suspense or thriller movie. Instead, I want the most romantic movies my friends would suggest – those with happy and nakakakilig ending please. Please, do not let me watch the movies alone..
• Visitors? The more the merrier! The whole family is required. Blockmates and my high school best friends are also obliged.
• Lastly, I want a stock of all of my favorite snacks and candies. There should be a pack of Potchi, lots of chocolates, and once in a while a caramel sundae. Those should be served to my visitors..
4.How people should treat me
I know it would be very impossible to ask them to not cry, but at least not inside the room. Cry but do not let my parents see you crying. I want to be treated just the same, as if I am just asleep. Dying for me is as simple as that – a long sleep. As much as possible, do the kwentuhan and chismisan inside my room. I would love to listen. I want my high school best friends to sing for me every single day while I am at the hospital. I want Jona to compose one song for me. I want my youngest sister to always talk to me at all possible instances.
Another thing. I want everyone to respect and not question the decision of my health care representatives. If the moment has come that they have decided to pull the plug of the life-supporting device or machine, let a priest bless me first. I want only my immediate family to be inside when that happens.
5.For my family and other last wishes
If in case I do not die instantaneously after the life support machine has been detached, I want to be moved to our house. There, I do not want visitors, I just want a couple of my closest friends every day, and wishes number 3 and 4 should still be observed.
For my sister, please when my death comes, delete my Friendster and multiply accounts. I find it scary if my accounts are still there and you will be surprised that they are still being maintained!
For my family, look for my diaries, I have messages for all of you. I love all of you, do not question that.
For my friends, especially JMVA, JDG, PJCB and SMJ, take charge of the wake and the funeral.
Before I die, I want a complete set of Harry Potter bought for my youngest sister. No casket-viewing – I do not know what I might look like after all of these. I do not want a picture above the casket. No flowers, but I want lots of lights. Music? Randomly play my mp3s. I want a blue casket – though I do not want to be buried. Cremation would be better. My ashes? It is up to my mother. I do not consent for any bible services – a priest’s blessings would be enough. My favorite foods should be served for everyone. No games of any sort. DVD marathon would be better. AND PLEASE do not make the wake too long – at maximum 3 nights. I want my remains to be burned at night, late night. Everybody who wants to witness it, wear green. By this time, I think everyone has accepted that I have died, so please no more crying. Cry during my wake, not this time.
AGAIN. I AM NOT READY TO DIE! I AM PLANNING TO LIVE A LONG LIFE.